The Rise and Fall ...

This blog post was supposed to be a way to highlight the ministry we have here in Germany, to provide an update on the things we’re doing. Well, I promise you that we have been busy since my last post over a year ago! If you really want to stay more informed, I do a bit better job with our semi-regular email newsletter, so let me know if you’d like to be added to that list. A lot of the time, I formulate a blog post in my mind and then second-guess that it actually articulates well enough the picture I’m trying to portray. So, then I just end up writing nothing - ha!

All of that to say, I really felt a nudging to go ahead and write this post. Some of you may have read the title and had an idea of where it was going. For those that don’t, there is a recent podcast series on Spotify called “The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill Church.” I had heard of it and even had friends talk about it, but I didn’t necessarily care to listen to it. Don’t get me wrong, I love real-life stories and in-depth documentaries, but I also really like Mark Driscoll. I had done my own research years ago when this “fall” was unfolding and had formed my own opinion already. I didn’t really want to hear what the maker of this podcast had to say - you know, just in case it was not in line with how I felt. ;) But, I was talking about the podcast series with a friend yesterday and decided I’d give it a listen today.

What transpired was quite unexpected.

The podcast really highlights and tells the story of what was going on culturally during the time that Mark Driscoll was planting Mars Hill Church.

My husband I were also planting a church around this same time frame, experiencing some similar things.

In the podcast, Mark is described as extremely masculine, in-your-face, preaching manhood and calling people to stand up against sin and the cultural norms. While that particular style of preaching was almost the complete opposite in the leader we had planted a church with, this podcast has highlighted so many other similarities. I was certainly intrigued. AND, the maker of the podcast, telling the story is actually doing an excellent job of really telling the story, seemingly without bias one way or the other. So, I listened on.

In the first couple of episodes, there are people who were caught up in the midst of everything happening at Mars Hill being interviewed. The ground work of the story is being laid - I keep noticing things that sound familiar. I hear my reality in the stories of these people. For us, as for many speaking on this podcast, there was such a beautiful community of believers living their lives together, there was life-transformation happening, the work of God was evident in the lives and stories of so many. It was pretty wonderful.

At the same time, though, there’s also a sense things just weren’t right either. They weren’t really the way you thought things should be. The things you witness from the inside aren’t really lining up with the Bible. In the podcast series, Mars Hill is at a much grander scale than what our reality was, but the story being told by those living it, felt so so real to me.

I’m currently only on episode 4. While the first 3 episodes were highlighting so many similarities for me, in this last episode, God broke my heart - the tears just started flowing and did not stop. As these people are interviewed, they’re asked why they didn’ t speak up, why they allowed such unbiblical leadership to continue. Man, I feel that so deeply. You feel caught between continuing in this beautiful thing that you are continually reminding yourself that God had called you to and calling out sin, speaking up against unbiblical leadership. That’s a hard thing to do. No one wants to be the one to isolate themselves from this family of believers that they’ve given their lives to serve, so you just choose to ignore.

Y’all, God allowed me to hear the realities of this completely separate church unfold, to totally pierce my heart, to open my eyes, and to release the floods of unforgiveness that I knew were taking up residence in my heart.

Many of the people in these podcast interviews did make decisions to leave Mars Hill, long before the downfall came. My husband and I did the same in our situation. It was so hard - and I can hear the pain in the voices of those in this podcast as well. The feelings are so raw - and it was almost a decade ago! As we left, I told a, then, very close friend of mine that I didn’t think God would allow such unbiblical leadership of His Church to continue for much longer and that a downfall was coming. The downfall came and it still hurt deeply. Such mass destruction took place and it infuriated me. I’ve held on, for so long, to the anger of that injustice I felt was done - to God and His Church, but also to me, personally. Oddly enough, God has used this podcast to say to me, lay it down. And it feels good.

Thank you, God, for the crazy things you use to speak to us. Thank you for redeeming the things our sinful hearts do, for using us and for using all things for your ultimate glory!

I do actually still like the message that Mark Driscoll has. But, living through what I did, it also helps shed light on the reason why I like his unapologetic approach to calling sin, sin. It’s ironic, I realize.